Why 'Lack of Awareness' Undermines Even the Smartest Leaders

What happens when the only person who doesn’t see the problem is the person causing it?

Lack of awareness is one of the most challenging leadership derailers because it disrupts decision-making, communication, and team dynamics. 

In this Leadership Traits Decoded episode, Cynthia Kyriazis and Drea Martin explore why this trait matters so deeply—especially in high-pressure environments where leaders must read situations accurately and adjust quickly.

They break down how low awareness shows up in day-to-day behavior, why it becomes more visible under stress or change, and how it can unintentionally derail strategy, collaboration, and trust. 

Equally important is their discussion on how to address it—whether you’re navigating it in yourself or coaching someone else. The key isn’t confrontation, but anchoring conversations in observable behavior, real impact, and space for reflection.

The hosts also highlight the responsibility senior leaders carry when this trait appears on their team: preparing thoughtfully, choosing examples carefully, and approaching the conversation with empathy and intention. While lack of awareness can be uncomfortable to surface, it is absolutely coachable when handled well.

You’ll Learn:

• How lack of awareness becomes a leadership derailer—especially under pressure or change
• The subtle ways low awareness shows up in communication, decision-making, and team dynamics
• Why direct confrontation rarely works—and what to do instead when addressing this trait
• How CEOs and senior leaders can prepare examples and frame conversations productively
• Why lack of awareness is coachable when leaders anchor feedback in behavior, impact, and reflection. 

For Leaders committed to building aligned, high-performing teams, this episode provides a grounded and practical look at one of the most overlooked derailers affecting culture and execution.

Ready to explore your leadership traits? Connect with us on LinkedIn or visit www.plllab.com to see how we transform leadership intelligence into return-driven action.

Chapters

• 0:00 Setting The Stage For Traits
• 1:07 Derailers And Why They Matter
• 1:45 Spotlight On Lack Of Awareness
• 3:20 Why Directness Backfires Here
• 4:40 Anchor Feedback To Impact
• 6:15 Coaching Leaders Through Defensiveness
• 8:00 Preparing Concrete Examples
• 11:00 Pause, Cool Off, Reengage
• 12:30 Applying This Across All Derailers

Transcript

Cynthia Kyriazis: 0:00

Welcome to Leadership Traits Decoded. I'm Cynthia Kyriazis, Chief Experience Officer at the Culture Think Tank.

Andrea Martin: 0:07

And I'm Drea Martin, Chief Operating Officer of the Crucible. We are collaborative partners at Performance Leadership Learning Lab, where we transform leadership intelligence into return-driven action.

Cynthia Kyriazis: 0:19

Today we're unpacking the leadership traits essential for building, investing in, and scaling successful companies. Our insights come directly from data-driven metrics within our platforms solution. So let's dive in.

Andrea Martin: 0:33

Hello, how are you doing today, Cynthia?

Cynthia Kyriazis: 0:36

Well, I'm really glad you asked that, Drea, because I have getting off of my of a cold and I have allergies. So I may sound a little nasally today, but that's been my life for the past week or so.

Andrea Martin: 0:49

How are you doing? Great. That's difficult. I'm fighting off the start of something. So we're gonna keep it all away from the podcast so we can uh but we're here, we're having a conversation anyway. So that's right.

Cynthia Kyriazis: 1:02

And it doesn't travel through the internet.

Andrea Martin: 1:04

Exactly. Not at this point, you know.

Cynthia Kyriazis: 1:07

So we kind of talked about something last time that triggered me last uh last time that we recorded anyway, we went to what uh we call contaminants, which are really derailers, traits that individuals in a leadership group someone has can derail the progress, the conversation, the strategy. So I went back and looked and I thought, let's do another derailleur. They're kind of fun and interesting, and it's something that you're very good at explaining, something that's difficult. So the last one that we did that we called a derailler was arrogance. And that was interesting because I learned a lot from that. This time the the one that I think jumped out at us was the one called lack of awareness. Critical, right? But when it is in a position of an individual who doesn't have that, it becomes a derailler of some type to some degree, right? So I thought, okay, let's talk about lack of awareness and the fact that you kind of measure it in reverse because it's a derailler. So let's go. What can you tell me about are there benefits to having the lack of awareness? That's a great question.

Andrea Martin: 2:11

I can't think of any. I think it's tough. And it's, I mean, and that's why it comes up as a derailer. Just a trait. I mean, you don't want to have a lack of awareness. It's just it's difficult because when you have low self-awareness, it can be trickier for people to engage with you, especially in leadership contexts. So it's one that when you see that within your own results or within someone else's results, it's definitely a more difficult one to have a conversation around. There's definitely some things you can do and we can chat about kind of how to best preface that conversation. But lack of awareness on a whole, no, I can't think of any reasons why you'd want it, but it is something that you can work on. So at least it's not a like any of the derailers, it's not great to have them. It means that whenever you're put in situations of higher stress or change, that there are things that might come to light and people around you might recognize and see that within your actions. But like anything, seeing that information, understanding it, and doing something about it means that you can actually change that.

Cynthia Kyriazis: 3:13

See, that's a really good point because my mind went to, well, what if I was Drea and I was doing this debrief on this assessment of this particular trait? And we already know this person has a difficulty and a lack of awareness. How does the conversation kind of generally typically go when somebody is introduced to a trait they either thought they didn't have or they thought they didn't have much of it? Or the reverse, thought they had a lot of it. So how does that conversation go if you're willing to share a little bit?

Andrea Martin: 3:41

Yeah, it's definitely an interesting conversation because it means we have to dive into a little bit. I feel like that's a situation where really direct feedback doesn't work, which is it's one of the rare situations where I'd recommend not to be super direct and instead to figure out how you can make something a little bit more digestible, less threatening, and maybe tie it more to outcomes or situations that they might see already and understand. So there's a few different ways that I like to tackle that. And it's typically, say, for example, someone has high lack of awareness on their report flagged. There might be other areas in the report where they'll have some points of contention because they lack some of that awareness. And I can't just blanket tell someone, like, oh, of course, you don't think this is accurate for you because of this contaminant that you flag, but instead can look at how do I anchor the things that I'm seeing in impact. So how this might impact the group or things that you might see happen because of this, instead of making it about their identity. So instead of telling them you might not realize you come across this way, talking about how certain things and having lower areas in this might play out to see if that kind of relates. So using kind of neutral, more concrete examples to help them understand what they might and maybe catch on to some of that potential reflection. But it's really looking at how you encourage and show the traits as a way to grow and invite reflection to say maybe you've seen some of this, maybe you've found this in other areas, maybe your strengths in these areas make you less aware of some of the weaknesses that you're able to kind of overcompensate for in other ways. But that's how I try to navigate it. It really depends on the person, what they're willing to hear. And the best is when they catch on to some example that resonates, and then they start to realize there's something that might be there.

Cynthia Kyriazis: 5:36

That's a really in-depth response to the question, which I think is great, because that's not an easy conversation necessarily to have over any trait that might be defined as a derailative. If you were this person's boss, usually in a leadership team, that would mean the CEO, the CEO is not as well-versed as you are. It doesn't go as deep into this issue, but they know that this person has value. We just need to find a way to help them. Is there anything special or different, or one or two key points that you would emphasize to the supervisor or the manager, the CEO about when they approach this individual?

Andrea Martin: 6:11

Yeah, I think that note I made about finding ways to talk about and make the feedback more digestible is really something to keep in mind. Making sure that you're talking about something so that it's not a like harsh judgment or something kind of that comes across as any kind of threat to that person's identity. Rather, is something that you're saying, this is something maybe that like we've noticed that you might notice as well, that is having a certain impact. Here are some examples, and really framing the entire thing in terms of offering tools, not just critique. And this is, I mean, that part I think is relevant to all feedback. Of course, you want to give them tools, not critique, but I think being a little bit more gentle with the way that that's communicated and trying to make sure that you're sharing enough information so that change can be made, especially if there's situations that are being like negatively impacted because of a person's lack of awareness and that you have to have that conversation, then that's a great time to really share enough, but don't overshare or maybe anticipate immediate understanding. You might have to work with personal a little bit more to try to get to a place of understanding.

Cynthia Kyriazis: 7:26

The thing that's popped into my head, and I'm not is is not intended to put you on the spot or help you be uncomfortable about it. But it with you saying that to an individual, you have the background and the depth around it, and you can speak to it just as you just did. What if the CEO has the ability to communicate this and the person turns around and responds with, Well, I don't know what you're talking about, give me an example. Would you suggest to the CEO to take this information and think back and reflect on how they've seen this individual interact within a the leadership group? Probably what wouldn't see them interact with a with a client, but if they had directly seen it and when they were reflecting on what this trade involves, that is what came up for them. And this is would you I'm asking, would you suggest or not suggest that a CEO, when they're put on the spotlight that give me a specific example because somebody's not believing them, would you suggest that the CEO think back before having this meeting to an example?

Andrea Martin: 8:25

Yeah, I think if they've already had that time to do that reflection, especially if you know the person you're going to talk with might turn around and say, give me an example, or not kind of inherently believe you or trust that your mentorship is well intended, then I would definitely prepare a few concrete examples. Ideally, something that's neutral enough that you can say, like specifically something recent, something tangible, and something that not just saying, like, oh, you're not very self-aware, but rather saying in yesterday's discussion, you spoke for 20 minutes before checking if anyone else agreed or something like that, where you can give kind of a concrete specific instance that that person can then understand versus saying, oh, well, this has been a trend. And if you haven't had that prep time, say you initiated this conversation expecting a better response or a more open response, I should say, versus better, a more open response. You can always say that you'd like some time kind of to reflect, to gather some examples, and maybe even give that person some time to cool off and come back to the conversation at a later time.

Cynthia Kyriazis: 9:29

Oh, that's really good. Taking a step back and not being afraid to say, let's take some time and think about it. Yeah, that's a really, really good point.

Andrea Martin: 9:38

Especially if they're feeling defensive. I think that's something we don't do often enough, especially in the corporate space. It's not emphasized enough of this, like sometimes that cool-off time is not only you going back and making sure you pick the example that's like the right one and it will help you achieve your goals the way that you want to and communicate effectively, but also sometimes that time is just good for both of you if somebody's feeling a little bit more on edge.

Cynthia Kyriazis: 10:01

I think that what the type of thing we're talking about might be the the response, the communication between the supervisor, the CEO, and the leader. Could be conceivably true for all of the derailers, because just by the name of derailor or just by the label of contaminants, that tells you any one of these could be contentious. So right now we have covered so far two of the eight. And I think it's okay if I just share what the other ones will be in the future. Yeah, hopefully. It's two or six, I believe.

Andrea Martin: 10:36

But yes, dive in.

Cynthia Kyriazis: 10:36

There's four more. One, two, three, four more, correct. So we've got the lack of awareness and arrogance we've already discussed. And the other four are fragility, hesitancy, the inability to adapt, and fear of failure. Those can all be derailers for an individual, and if not recognized by them and and their boss, it can be uh derailing many scenarios when you don't really ever want some scenarios to derail. So we'll be doing those in the future, but we hope that this discussion about lack of awareness was something that brought value to you and that some of our pointers helped. Do you have any takeaway, Drea, from this particular one?

Andrea Martin: 11:17

Um, I think your point as to the fact that any of these kind of derailers are important to kind of have some of that extra, maybe just putting some extra thought into having conversations around them, especially because any assessment, when you read through your results, it can feel, and I've been on this end where I'm reviewing with an executive and they're reading through their report and they say it kind of feels like their diary of like this, it feels private. They thought this was going on subconsciously, they didn't realize people are gonna have access to this. And it's not discouragement from taking that time and seeing those results, but rather recognizing sometimes it's hard to see things on paper that you might feel and that impact the way you act. So you need to know that information so you can do something about it, you can develop, you can change. But having that extra, even maybe compassion around that sometimes seeing some of this stuff come to light and now having the terminology to talk about it can be difficult.

Cynthia Kyriazis: 12:12

Yes. Oh, totally. Amen. That's totally totally true. I think what came up for me was you said it, compassion or empathy for the person who's delivering the information, that not everybody has the same level of awareness around themselves, around all these different traits and what's needed. So before going into it, take some time and reflect on whether or not you have seen this person in action and just take a moment to think about what that means for themselves, first of all, and their growth and what it means for the rest of the team, and what it means for the clients or customers that those individuals are speaking to. So just a level of awareness and then come into it with an open mind, but with compassion and empathy, because it's not going to be easy for that for that person at all. Right. Okay, Drea, as usual, a wealth of information. Learned so much. Thank you so much for sharing all your uh experience and wisdom with us. Of course, and right back at you. Thanks so much. Okay, see you next time. Thanks for listening to this episode of Leadership Traits Decoded. You'll be able to find all our episodes on the Performance Leadership Learning Lab website at www.plab.com. Or you can listen on your favorite streaming platform.

Andrea Martin: 13:27

We'll be back soon to explore the next essential trait. Until then, feel free to connect with us on LinkedIn if you have any questions or ideas.